The Annals of Miss RosieMarie

Today I am going to be brief. Everyone had the day off so me and my sissies got to spend most of the day outside. I liked it. Molly made a little nest in a leaf-filled urn that has not been planted and Jodie and I sunned in the grass.
It did not rain and wasn’t too cold. I was not even disappointed that my whole wheat crackers did not have any peanut butter when it was time for our snack. After all, a day off meant I got more than my fair share of frozen carrots, admiring glances from passersby, and no bath or nail trimming or ear cleaning.
I am not a prissy girl. Rather I am a tomboy. I love getting dirty, tearing up fluffy toys and chewing on the sofa when I can get away with it. My litter-sister, Abby, is the prissy one. She is such a dainty eater. Nibble, nibble, sit back and chew, swallow, pause, rinse and repeat. Oh puleeez.
I like to dive into my food with gusto. To hell with convention and manners. Speaking of manners, I am reminded that Dad came home late from work last night. He wanted turkey burgers and shared some with me. He is my kind of human. Later we shared some chips. Yummy.
Dad never minds being slimed after I drink water, lets me gnaw on his arm when we wrestle, and is generally an all-round well-trained fellow. Mom prefers to cuddle. She likes me to behave, not chew Jodie when I am bored, and play with my own toys. She does not like it when I grab tissues directly from the box and run to my crate to snack. I try and hide my finds but she always knows where to look.
Dad, on the other hand, is more laid back. Now I get into trouble if he catches me chewing furniture and computer parts. But when I make unintentional mistakes he is pretty forgiving. Take last Thursday night, for instance. Mom and Dad were playing World of WarCraft. Mom got up to make herself some tea.
Mom loves tea. Dad is manlier and drinks Mountain Dew. I drink water. Sometimes I sneak the Mountain Dew or maybe a sip of milk when no one is looking, but I am a country girl and prefer a more natural beverage. Water is better for my coat and overall good looks. I may be a tomboy but i now how to turn a head or two.
Anyway, while Mom was in the kitchen I decided to check out an interesting smell emanating from her desk close to her keyboard. I pulled a cord attached to her headset and got caught wrapped up in her stuff. I looked a little techno-hot, if you know what I mean. I was really digging this new look when mom came back from the kitchen, which is next to her office.
I jumped and ripped the headset cord from the jack and ran from the room. Mom tried to stop me. I guess she wanted to untangle the cords but finders keepers. Anyway, Dad came in and I saw my young life flash before my eyes. I quickly dashed into my crate and tried to hide the evidence but I could not. The headset was hanging from my head and the cord was wrapped around my body. All in all, I looked very sexy. Bloodhounds are very sexy anyway and the headset made me appear very chic.
Mom removed my hot new ensemble. Dad forgave me, of course. He said it was not my fault the desk was left unattended when Mom knows how curious I am. Whew! I just love my Dad. He cuddled me and asked me if I was okay and stuff. I later overheard him tell a friend if he had been there I would have been supper for the next couple of weeks. I am sure that was bravado because he adores me.
Who would not? We are the Green Eggs and Ham of the Doggie World! Would you, could you in a car? On a boat? In a plane? On the sofa? In the rain? Say you love Bloodhounds, yes please do and we will slurp a kiss on you.